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I have been thinking a lot lately about many of my former (and current) students and clients and kind of cataloguing them in my mind based on what I know they are up to now.

They cover the spectrum from those who are now full time property investors who have totally and permanently changed their lives, right through to people who have never done a thing with what they have learned.

The group that caused me the most “concern” within myself are those who had a bad experience early on who have never recovered.

I worked very hard in my mentoring programmes to try and find a way to get more than the industry average of 4% of people to get a good result. I achieved this but I was always frustrated that I couldn’t get more people to take consistent action.

But the people who seemed to be the biggest casualties are those who take action and find it doesn’t go according to plan. My experience has been that in most cases they become paralysed and usually never try anything ever again.

I treat setbacks or negative experiences as education and try to learn from my mistakes. It never occurs to me to stop, just to get better at it.

As I go through my first flat/slump phase for example I have learned untold stuff that will change how I invest in the future. I understand the more conservative old school investors a lot more because they don’t want to experience what they experienced in their first slump again.

But what is it that allows some of us to get up and try again and others to curl up and die??

Well there are many correct answers, however I believe that one of the critical issues is low self esteem.

When I get something wrong I look at the situation and look at how to not go there again. I am even more motivated than before the error as I have to make that loss up to get back to where I was.

But many of us face a failure and start an internal conversation that progresses a bit like this:
” It was stupid of me to do that”
” Only an idiot would have done that, therefore I am an idiot”
” I was a fool to ever think that this would go well”
” I deserve what is happening to me”
” I am destined to fail”
” I will never try again, then I will fail less, because if I try I know I will fail”

I’m sure you never think like this but you may have a friend who does.

We need to combat these lies, and lies they are, with truth!!

” It was stupid of me to do that”
Well it wasn’t clever but what did I actually do wrong?? What rules can I put in place to protect myself from this in the future.

” Only an idiot would have done that, therefore I am an idiot”
Many, many successful people have failed dramatically several times in their lives. The fact I was willing to try actually makes me better than most people.

” I was a fool to ever think that this would go well”
Life throws us curve balls but I know that what I am trying can and does work. I may need more education or assistance but I am not going to beat myself up over a mistake. I would have to be a robot to be perfect.

” I deserve what is happening to me”
I deserve to be the best me I can be. I will not allow circumstances to dictate what I deserve or get.

” I am destined to fail”
I am destined to win. I am created to be an overcomer, a conqueror, a powerful contributor to my family and my community. I’m a winner before I even get out of bed.

” I will never try again, then I will fail less, because if I try I know I will fail”
I will emulate Thomas Edison who said of his light bulb experiments, ” I have not failed, i have just found 10,000 ways that don’t work”.
I will get up when I am knocked down until I succeed, I owe it to my family my God and myself. Failure is an experience, not a person.