Archive for funny friday
Sometimes things seem complex when the numbers are really big or there are a lot of layers to the problem.
Simply moving a decimal point can make a massive difference!!
And that’s why we can buy their real estate so cheaply for quite a while yet
Get Going and Stay Safe ~ Dean Letfus
(No idea if this ever actually appeared anywhere on their site but funny )
This was apparently actually posted very briefly on the McDonnell-Douglas web site by an employee there who obviously has a sense of humor. The company, of course, does not (have a sense of humor) – and made the web department take it down immediately.
Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop new products that best meet your needs and desires.
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First Name: ……………………………………………..
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2. Which model aircraft did you purchase?
[_] F-14 Tomcat
[_] F-15 Eagle
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Jono Gibbs, Chiefs
“Nobody in Rugby should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.”
Rodney So’ialo, Hurricanes, on University
“I’m going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.”
Colin Cooper, Hurricanes head coach
“You guys line up alphabetically by height.” And, “You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle.”
Chris Masoe (Hurricanes) on whether he had visited the Pyramids during his visit to Egypt .
“I can’t really remember the names of the clubs that we went to.”
Colin Cooper on Paul Tito
“He’s a guy who gets up at six o’clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.”
Kevin Senio ( Auckland ), on Night Rugby vs Day Games
“It’s basically the same, just darker.”
David Nucifora ( Auckland ) talking about Troy Flavell
“I told him, ‘Son, what is it with you… Is it ignorance or apathy?’ He said, ‘David, I don’t know and I don’t care.’
David Holwell (Hurricanes) when asked about the upcoming season:
“I want to reach for 150 or 200 points this season, whichever comes first.”
“Colin has done a bit of mental arithmetic with a calculator.”
“We actually got the winning try three minutes from the end but then they scored.”
“I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.”
“That kick was absolutely unique, except for the one before it which was identical.”
“I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.”
“Sure there have been injuries and deaths in rugby, but none of them serious.”
“If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again.”
“I never comment on referees and I’m not going to break the habit of a lifetime for that prat.”
(1) “Andy Ellis the 21 year old, who turned 22 a few weeks ago”
(2) “He scored that try after only 22 seconds – totally against the run of play.”
(3) “I would not say he (Rico Gear) is the best left winger in the Super14, but there are none better.”
(4) “Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw.”
(5) “Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer.”
“Have you ever thought of writing your autobiography?”
Get Going and Stay Safe ~ Dean Letfus
An elderly Priest lay dying.
He sent a message for an Inland Revenue Service Agent and his Attorney to come to the hospital.
When they arrived, they were ushered up to his room. As they entered the room, the Pastor held out his hands and motioned for them to sit on each side of the bed. The Pastor grasped their hands, sighed contentedly, smiled, and stared at the ceiling. For a time, no one said anything.
Both the IRS Agent and Attorney were touched and flattered that the Priest would ask them to be with him during his final moments. However, they were also puzzled because the Priest had never given any indication that he particularly liked either one of them.
Finally, the Attorney asked, “Pastor, why did you ask the two of us to come here?”
The Pastor mustered all his strength and then said weakly,
“Jesus died between two thieves, so that’s how I’m going to go.”
Get Going and Stay Safe ~ Dean Letfus
It’s Friday in New Zealand, time for a laugh, have a great day!!
Get going and Stay Safe ~ Dean.
Have you ever wondered how the US attempts to bail out their economy?
Thanks to Paul for this outstanding and succinct analogy!!
The rain is beating down and the streets are deserted.
Times are tough, everybody is in debt, and everybody lives on credit.
On this particular day a rich German tourist is driving through the town, stops at the local hotel and lays a €100 note on the desk, telling the hotel owner he wants to inspect the rooms upstairs in order to pick one to spend the night.
The owner gives him some keys and, as soon as the visitor has walked upstairs, the hotelier grabs the €100 note and runs next door to pay his debt to the butcher.
The butcher takes the €100 note and runs down the street to repay his debt to the pig farmer.
The pig farmer takes the €100 note and heads off to pay his bill at the supplier of feed and fuel.
The guy at the Farmers’ Co-op takes the €100 note and runs to pay his drinks bill at the pub.
The publican slips the money along to the local prostitute drinking at the bar, who has also been facing hard times and has had to offer him “services” on credit.
The hooker then rushes to the hotel and pays off her room bill to the hotel owner with the €100 note.
The hotel proprietor then places the €100 note back on the counter so the rich traveller will not suspect anything.
At that moment the traveller comes down the stairs, picks up the €100 note, states that the rooms are not satisfactory, pockets the money, and leaves town.
No one produced anything. No one earned anything. However, the whole town is now out of debt and looking to the future with a lot more optimism.
And that, Gentlemen, is how a bailout package works.
Stay Inspired and Stay Safe ~ Dean Letfus